At my house, we have a trash drawer. I don’t mean a junk drawer, although we have one of those too. This is a drawer in our kitchen specially designed to hold a trash can. When you want to throw something away, you open the drawer, put in your trash, and then shut it. I suppose this is to keep the trash can out of sight and keep the kitchen tidy. For the most part, it works pretty well. The glitch comes, as you might expect, when the trash can is full. As is human nature, we tend to overfill the trash can rather than empty it. I’m guessing that this is a common happening in many homes. The difference with the trash drawer set up comes when you shut the drawer on a trash can that is full beyond its limits. The garbage overflows into the back of the drawer where it keeps the drawer from closing correctly and becomes difficult to get out. It turns a routine chore into something a little more time-consuming and aggravating.
From my perspective, the best approach is obvious. Empty the trash can when it is full. Simple. Another option is to leave the trash can full, but leave the drawer open and hope someone else empties the trash. The third scenario, the shove-the-trash-down-and-shove-the-drawer-shut option, is unfortunately an all too common practice at our house.
The other day, as I was extracting trash from the back of the drawer, I was thinking about how this is similar to something that happens inside of us. We all have trash, attitudes and actions that need discarded, that keep us from being the best version of ourselves (to borrow a phrase from Matthew Kelly). When we think of the yucky stuff in our hearts, we can all agree that it piles up just like the trash in the kitchen. And over and over, we are faced with a decision. Do we empty the trash, or do we push it down and try to hide it? It’s not going to go away by itself. And just like the trash in my kitchen, the longer we procrastinate and the more we try to close the drawer so people can’t see it, the worse off we are.
This seems pretty obvious, and sounds logical to me. It’s easy to agree about the generalities of keeping your inner self clean, but I took it a step further. I have been pondering specifically what trash I have, and what it means to address it before it overflows and stops things from working the way they are designed to work.
I have been thinking of the instruction given by Paul, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” (Ephesians 4:2). It surprised me to find the same words used by Jesus in a well-known passage, Matthew 11:28-30. “ ‘Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.’ “
Humble and gentle. Gentle and humble in heart.
Too often, I find the opposites in me: proud and harsh. In fact, I would say that the vast majority of my trash can be attributed to pride and self-centeredness. Ouch. I’m also pretty sure that there are lots of times that I ignore those attitudes and the thoughts and actions that flow from them, pushing them down and closing the drawer on them so at least they feel hidden.
What does it mean to empty my inner trash? How can I get rid of proud and self-centered and become more humble and gentle like Jesus?
First of all, I have to see the trash. In today’s world, we often go through our days in survival mode and at a break-neck pace, fulfilling demands and putting out fires and sometimes missing what is important because there is so much that feels urgent. In that framework, it is pretty hard to notice when I am acting or speaking out of pride and with my own interests first. Paying more attention to what’s going on inside me as I go through the day is a necessary step to seeing where there is trash to empty. I think it is helpful to think of some triggers to remind me to stop and evaluate the status of my internal trash can.
One trigger is when I start to see other people’s trash. Jesus’ message, “Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. For with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5), is great advice about remembering to look for trash in yourself. For some reason, no matter how busy I am, I do find time to notice things that other people could improve. My goal is that when I find myself thinking about what’s less than perfect in someone else, I take that opportunity to find and empty my own pride and self-centeredness.
Another trigger is found in the words of Jesus I mentioned earlier. Jesus said that if we are in need of rest, we should learn from Him, the One who is gentle and humble in heart. When I start to feel frustrated or worried, that is the opposite of rest. Those feelings are usually an indicator that I am not living in the Jesus way of humility and gentleness and that there is trash to empty. When I find myself frustrated or worried and lacking rest, I want to pause and find the trash in me and move it out.
So, how do I get rid of the trash? Yes, first I have to see it, but how do I change it? The great news is that I don’t have to do it by my own will-power. Take it from David, a man who had some trash that needed to go. Psalm 51 records his prayer that God would clean him up. In verse 7 he says, “Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow,” and in verse 10, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me.” The way to get rid of the things need discarded from inside me is to let God do it. If I am willing and ask, He does the cleaning. Sounds too good to be true, but try it!
My sister reminded me of a song we used to listen to in the 80’s, by David Meece. I had forgotten all about it, but the lyrics are just right for trash removal…
Replace It With Your Love
Where there’s hate give me love
Where there’s pride make me be humble
Where there’s pain don’t let me feel resentment deep inside
I want You to make it right
So replace it with Your love in my heart
Replace it with Your love in my heart
Just take out all the hatred and cleanse every part
And replace it with Your love in my heart
When I’m tired lift me up
When I’m weak, Lord, don’t let me falter
But if I fall, don’t let me harbor bitterness inside
I want You to take it out
Lord, I’m just a man who wants to be like You
Living in Your perfect love in everything I do
So now I’m yielding I’m yielding all to You
To take out every wrong I feel inside
So replace it with Your love in my heart
Replace it with Your love in my heart
Just take out all the hatred and cleanse every part
And replace it with Your love in my heart
If you have time, listen to the song :).
Just like emptying the kitchen trash, emptying the heart trash is a job that we get to do over and over again, and making a habit of doing it instead of putting it off makes life smoother and better.
Jesus, thanks for Your words about being humble and gentle. As I go through each day, help open my eyes to my pride and self-centeredness. Remind me to take it to You and let You replace it with Your love. Thank You that You love me in my mess and that You empower me to become clean.
-Leah











