Sleepless

I’ve always been a good sleeper. So much so, that my husband sometimes teases me about it. He’ll say things like, “If sleeping were an Olympic sport, you’d win a gold medal.” Or, “If sleeping were a spiritual gift, you’d definitely have that one.” It’s a blessing, really. I fall asleep easily at night, and I stay asleep through the night.

I also really need good sleep. When I don’t sleep, mole hills become mountains, and I have a difficult time keeping my emotions in check.

You may notice that you haven’t heard a lot from me in a while. The reason for that is that Aaron and I became the foster parents to two beautiful little girls on June 23rd. They are 5 years-old and 2 years-old, and I wish I could share pictures of them with you (we are not allowed to do that because of privacy guidelines). Our 5 year-old is autistic and nonverbal. As you can imagine, these little girls are keeping these 40-something foster parents BUSY!

One of the unfortunate symptoms of ASD is sleeplessness. It is not uncommon for little A to sleep 3-4 hours and then be wide awake for the rest of the night. On our worst night, she fell asleep at 9:30 and was awake at 11:30. When you pair her sleeplessness with my need for sleep, it can be a bad combination. As my sister has said, “It’s not sustainable.”

It’s in the light of that part of my journey that I happened upon Psalm 121 today –

“I lift up my eyes to the hills.
    From where does my help come?
My help comes from the Lord,
    who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved;
    he who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, he who keeps Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;
    the Lord is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
    nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all evil;
    he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in
    from this time forth and forevermore.”

“He who keeps you will not slumber.” Isn’t that a beautiful promise? The whole chapter is a gem, but as I pondered those words in particular, it brought a smile to my heart.

God doesn’t need sleep. There’s never a moment when He takes a rest from keeping us. And His sleeplessness doesn’t make him irritable. It reminds me of the words to a children’s song I’ve heard –

“Even though the Good Shepherd counts sheep, He never sleeps…”

Right this moment, He is keeping us. He is our keeper. He will keep us from all evil; He will keep our lives. He will keep our going out and our coming in from this time forth and forevermore.

I hope these words bring as much comfort to your heart today as they did to mine. I’m so glad our Heavenly Father is always awake. And in the same way that I know my little A needs rest for her body, He knows that our souls need rest. We can rest our souls in Him because He is always keeping us.

Dear Father, thank You that You always keep us. We are so safe in Your hands. You neve take a break – there’s never a moment when You’re not watching over us. Please give us rest for our souls today as we meditate on Your promises. Amen.

-Dana